One day there was a girl called Mia. She was going for a walk and she saw the sun rise. As the sun came out she yelled "It is shining like stars !" She could not believe it. The sun went “pop” and another sun came out. It was amazing then it happened again. There was a baby sun too and it was bright. Mia could not see. The sun shining in her eyes. Everyone went home. Mia's garden was full with people. She had pets, a kitten and a dog. They lived happy ever after.
Chloe -
ReplyDeleteThis is a lovely story, and you've really used your imagination. I particularly liked the description of Mia's garden: full of people and with pets, too.
Have you thought about using connectives like "and", "but" or "however" to make longer sentences? They can make stories even more fun to read.
Well done - I enjoyed reading this!
-MikeB (team 100wc).